If you’ve read my book, by now you know I’m forever looking for more ways to appreciate myself and other people. And for the most part I thought I had figured out the whole self love thing, so recently I was pleasantly surprised to discover I wasn’t having compassion for myself as much as I thought.
A recent relationship had left me feeling like I had lost my vibrational balance and I didn’t realise at the time but I was very critical of myself and how I handled the ups and downs. At the time I thought I had resentment towards this person, because no matter how much I tried I couldn’t move on. So I naturally assumed that I had some subtle negative emotions towards this person. For weeks I thought the source of my subtle unhappiness was something I was holding against this person.
Something in my life was not shifting.
Till one Friday night, as I was getting ready for bed, a thought suddenly occurred to me. It was as if someone said “you know you are doing extremely well, given the circumstances and what happened, you’ve kept your balance well”. This voice came as a surprise to me as I generally keep telling myself I can be better, I should be doing better…
And suddenly I felt a huge load lift off me. It felt so good to hear that from myself. To feel compassion for myself. It’s funny as people in my life had been applauding how well I handled it for months, but I wasn’t applauding. And that was the missing link for me.
I was not giving myself the credit I craved so badly. And at the time I didn’t know I needed to have more compassion for myself. I guess you don’t know what you don’t know! So over the weekend each night as I prepared for bed, I reminded myself that I had actually dealt with the situation the best way possible. I had kept my balance, and that all is well.
I didn’t realise how much of an impact this changed perspective would have on my life till a few days went by. I started feeling noticeably better. I was happier, had more energy, my skin was glowing and awesome manifestations started popping up around me. Suddenly the love I was receiving from everyone increased, and a few physical imbalances in my body began to heal. And more importantly I no longer felt any attachment or connection to that original person. And as I suspected, it was not resentment I felt for them, it was lack of appreciation for myself.
Looking back I’m still amazed at how having a little compassion for myself was the missing piece I had felt for months.
So my biggest lesson for the past few months was compassion. What was yours? In what areas can you have more compassion, towards yourself or others?